Returning to your true self

There are 4 stages of being on the way to returning to your true self:

1 Survival mode.

In this phase, you spend large periods feeling overly stressed and are possibly experiencing some anxiety and depression. Life feels chaotic and you are mostly just trying to get trough the day.

2 Managing day to day, work, relationships, energy etc.

You start to consider and challenge limiting beliefs here and learn to tune into the body and reconnect to it. You learn to put your needs first and will examine and restructure parts of your daily thinking and behaviour.

3 Open, able and willing to look at patterns, behaviour past trauma etc.

This is where a deepening occurs. Engrained patterns, conditioning, shame and negative though loops are addressed and resolved. A key step on the path of returning to who you truly are and realising what you are capable of.

4 Embracing true self and exploring the purpose and life that opens up from that space.

Meaning and purpose is clear here and you have the energy and resources to create a life that feels good.

It is not possible (in the absence of miracles) to skip any steps and the key to move from one to the next is resourcing: building resilience and capacity so there is sufficient energy in the system to do the work required.

Creating a greater level of capacity and resilience in the body is how we move through the steps. It’s a very natural process, but is one we have forgotten in a world where we are taught to think and action and intellectualise everything.

The primary step is just noticing where you are at.

No stage is good or bad, it just is.

So many people want to dive straight in at 4 and are frustrated when they can’t, or find the experience too draining.

This is simply an indication that more resources are required to equip the system.

This is essential because doing any of this work takes up massive amounts of energy.

When you are in survival and your energy is depleted your body will never let you use the resources it has available for the later steps.

There isn’t enough energy there for your day to day life AND making the big shifts. You are barely surviving. (Again not a moral judgement of good or bad – just a noticing. We live in a world where we are depleted.)

So there needs to be an initial stage of resourcing and repairing before all your stuff your brain wants to do now can take place.

And it’s not impossible to do this solo, but it is difficult because it does require a different approach to life.

Space is required.

Learning to do less and create more, to take care and listen to what you need so there is capacity for the other bits.

Trying to skip steps is like wanting to wait to be able to run a marathon before you start training. It doesn’t work.

Once a system is resourced we can get to work and there is then a very natural progression through the stages.

I work with clients through all the stages in a deeply personal and tailored 12 month container.

If you think you need to get to step 2,3, or 4 before you are ready, you may wait a lifetime.

We start at step 1, with what is and we work with your system and at your home pace to move through.

The process is simple and it’s effective.

It meets you where you are and let’s you get to where you want to go – on the timeline that works for YOU and your system.

When you are ready to walk this path, I am ready to walk alongside you.

Email me and we can go from there.


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